Gisingin Ang Donya!

Bakit kaya ganun, ang malas ko talaga sa helper?

Since part time lang ang work ng helper ko, I give her an hour of lunch break to rest and short breaks for merienda. Pagbaba ko ng 1:30 pm, nanood pa ng TV. Okay, fine. Around 2:15, aba, tulog ang hitad! Alas tres na tulog pa rin! Ginising ko na, "Ginalyn, Ginalyn..." Aba, parang tuod lang, di man lang naalimpungatan.

Pagdating ng alas-tres medya, hayun, bumangon na ang donya. Meanwhile, tambak pa rin ang labahin at di pa rin natitiklop ang mga fresh clothes.

Gusto kong pagalitan, but I didn't kasi ang init ng ulo ko and I get shrill pag iritado. Bukas na lang pag kalmado na ako.

Ghost Month Extravaganza

Warning: A lot of whining up ahead.

Sabi ghost month daw from August 14 to September 12.

From Wikipedia:

As the ghosts and the suffering spirits will come out from the hell to visit their homes during the 7th lunar month (the ghost month), many things should be avoided during this month including the ghost day.
1. Don't stroll at night. Guilty.
2. Don't swim. It is said that drowned evil ghosts might try to drown people in order to find victims for them to rebirth. Guilty. Thankfully, hindi kami nalunod.
3. As the month is considered to be inauspicious, don't move to a new house, start new businesses or marry.
4. Don't hang clothes outside at night. Guilty.
5. Do not pick up coins or money found on the street and if one does, never bring any home.
6. Do not step on or kick the offerings by the roadside. If one were to step on any offerings by accident, he or she should apologize aloud to ameliorate the situation.
7. Do not wear red because ghosts are attracted to red. Guilty.
8. Don't sing and whistle as these may attract ghosts. Guilty. Kahit hindi ghost month, pag kumanta ako, maglalabasan talaga lahat ng multo.
9. Keep away from the walls as it is believed that ghosts like sticking to walls.
10. If someone is born during the ghost month, avoid celebrating birthday at night. It's better to celebrate during the daytime. Guilty. 

 Kyeber lang. Hindi naman ako superstitious. 

Episode 1: After we came back from Manila, sunod-sunod kaming nagkasakit. First, TheHusband. Next, Sharkteeth. Grand finalé, yours truly. To think fully vaccinated ang entire Team KoKo against the flu, well, except TheDog.

Kyeber lang talaga. Hindi ako superstitious. 
 
Episode 2: Three joybidders and three complete a**hole buyers in Ebay. I was supremely peeved. Ikukwento ko na lang ito in another post solely devoted to my (good and bad) Ebay experiences.
Hmmmm...not so kyeber anymore...could it be true?

Episode 3: My freelance client is cutting outsourcing by half. It took me by surprise and I was so shaken -- to the core. You might think I'm being overly dramatic (again!), but you have to consider that they pay well and are very consistent in sending me work and that I have a very good relationship with my production editor/contact. In short, mahirap humanap ng ganyan na client. The client emailed me minutes later, saying I won't be affected by the cut. Which didn't comfort me much. For me, it's a cold reminder that all this work is fleeting. All the world is fleeting, if I might add. Boom! Anyare? A simple email brought out not only pragmatic concerns but philosophical as well, and I don't like thinking philosophical (and existential) thoughts -- they make me sad and I was downtrodden for days.
Teka lang ha...parang naniniwala na talaga ako sa ghost month eklavu na yan.

Episode 4: When the weekend came, TheHusband got ill, and upon checkup, he was admitted due to dehydration. His stomach was cramping so much and his temperature very high. We all slept in the hospital, which was not comfortable at all and I woke up all sore. Thankfully, he was discharged last Tuesday.
*Kapit lang, TPS.* Teka, teka, teka, si TheHusband ang may sakit, yet ako pa ang mas emote. Hehehe. Me, me, me, me, me. *Glad you're well na, TheHusband!*

Episode 5: But no, it ain't over till it's over. On the morning of our last day in the hospital, I briefly went home to get Sharkteeth's stuff for school, and on my way back, TheHusband and Sharkteeth called me, saying that S's schoolbag got wet. I was wondering why they had to call me for that and I snappishly replied, "Eh di ilipat nyo ang gamit sa ibang bag." Well, pagdating ko sa hospital room, I understood. The entire room was flooded with ~1 inch of water. S was under the shower for about 30 minutes and the water overflowed. *Anak!!! Hindi eto hotel! Not exactly the time or place for luxurious baths!!!* Basa ang bags! Basa ang chargers! Basa ang laptop! Basa ang shoes! Basa lahat! *I think you need more training, my dear Katara. Water-bending skills aren't learned overnight.*

May isa pang particularly bad na pangyayari, but it's not my story to tell. Needless to say, I was saddened by it immensely. Haaaaay. Saturday, you can't come fast enough. Pagod na pagod na ako.

TPS Does Drama Queen

Every time we get back from Manila, may baon kami pagbalik. Sakit, that is! TheHusband was the index case sa House KoKo. Medyo masama ang tama kay TheHusband, kasi, aba, um-absent ang lolo! Hindi naman yun nag-a-absent unless may trip kami. Even after he got better, he was a bit lethargic.


Then Sharkteeth. Minsan tumawag sa akin ang secretary sa school. Nasa clinic daw si S, nilalagnat. Juskopo. But when I got there, she was feeling better na daw. Nakahinga ako ng maluwag. Nakuha pang magpunta ng National Bookstore at bumili ng libro. But come Saturday and Sunday, all-out trifecta na: cough, cold, and fever. Naturally low ang temperature ni S, and even without taking her temperature, I know when she has fever. Others get feverish at 37.5°C, siya, 36°C lang, lagnat na. Thank goodness she got better by Monday.

Then yours truly. Ang yabang ko pa. I said, "ako lang ang hindi tinamaan ah!" Hubris. Come Wednesday afternoon, I kept on sneezing na. Not the allergic rhinitis type of sneeze. Tapos ang sakit na ng throat ko.

Hindi pwedeng magkasakit!


Paracetamol, check!
ConzACE, check!
Green tea, check!
Turmeric tea, check!
Lemon water, check!
Pineapple juice, check!


Tapos hirap na hirap akong makatulog. Nakakatulog naman ako ng maaga, but I'd wake up in the middle of the night, unable to fall back to sleep. You must know by now that sleeping and my relationship with my bed are things I hold most sacred. So, grumpy akong maghapon. Come Thursday, ang dami kong deliverables -- editing files and IG sales alike. Had to refund somebody and with my old Nokia phone out of commission (where my BPI app is), I had no choice but to go to the bank. I tried so many times depositing the money in the automated deposit machine, but it just won't accept the cash. Akala ko problem sa account. I had to return in the afternoon. Pagbalik ko with new bank details, ganun pa rin. Apparently, ayaw ng machine ng crisp bills. Kailangan medyo luma. *Eyeroll* Grabe, pagod na pagod ako.


I spent Friday and Saturday lying on bed, watching films and shows, feeling sorry for myself. Sorry, drama queen lang ang peg. Pero ang dami kong napanood na films -- Little Boy, About Time, Mamma Mia, Game of Thrones, Friends, etc. So it wasn't so bad after all, kasi I rarely get to relax. Heto, Sunday morning na, and I'm feeling better, pero like what happened to TheHusband, lethargic pa rin. At least, may panglasa na ako. I made some egg drop soup earlier and I can taste it again. Unlike last night when TheHusband got me a bowl of lomi and wala talagang lasa.

Feeling ko kasalanan eto ng flu shot ko eh. I felt something off with that shot kasi I don't usually get a fever sa flu shots, but this time, not only was the shot very painful, but I got low-grade fever and swollen lymph nodes as well. Tsk, tsk, tsk. I just hope to feel better soon.

Mga Kwentong Sinauna: Nung Ma-Deads Si Uncle

Iisa ang uncle ko sa maternal side, and he had Down syndrome. They didn't realize immediately that he had it. Madear said that they were delighted kasi he was extremely flexible nung baby pa, pero medyo nagtaka sila, and only then did they seek a doctor. He didn't attend school, pero he was relatively independent. Mabait yun, although kung minsan, pag tinopak, maghahalo ang balat sa tinalupan. I remember once hiding in the wardrobe with my cousins kasi nagwawala sya. Pagkatapos naman nun, okay na uli. Marcos loyalist yun -- he would spend hours just watching Marcos' speeches. He must have been mesmerized.

Isa sa mga health problems ng may Down syndrome is congenital heart defect. And yun ang kinamatay ni Uncle, pero relatively matagal din ang buhay nya. Syempre, being the panganay, punong-abala si Madear sa lamay. Hindi halos natutulog. Pagod na pagod. Parang adrenaline na lang ang nag-po-propel sa kanyang kumilos. Nung araw ng libing, before ilabas ng bahay ang patay, may padasal muna, led by the oldies, along with Madear and her other siblings, my aunts (umuwi din si Auntie Bebeng).

...
Salamin ng katwiran...
Luklukan ng karunungan...
Mula ng tuwa namin...
Sisidlan ng kabanalan...
Sisidlang bunyi at bantog...
Sisidlang bukod na mahal na makusaing sumunod sa
Panginoong Diyos...
Rosang bulaklak, na di mapuspos ng bait ng tao ang halaga...
Tore ni David...
Toreng Garing...
Bahay na Ginto...
Kaban ng Tipan...
Pinto ng langit...
Talang maliwanag...
Mapagpagaling sa mga taong makasalanan
...

Bigla na lang si Madear, while sitting, slumped on the wall against her.

Sigaw ang oldies, "NAKU, SI NENE. INATAKE SA PUSO!!!" Nagkagulo ang mga tao. Nakalimutan for a moment si Uncle. Nakalimutan ang tore ni David, toreng garing, bahay na ginto, kaban ng tipan...

Siguro dahil sa sobrang ingay, biglang tayo si Madear. Nagulat na naman lahat kasi nga, diba "SI NENE. INATAKE SA PUSO!!!" Turned out NAKATULOG lang si Madear sa sobrang pagod. Phew.

Heart attack kaagad? Di ba pwedeng exhausted lang muna?

My Coño Madear

I took the liberty of editing the translation:

"Oh, [TPS], your dad killed a snake in our kitchen. It was as long as my arms and as big as my thumb. He saw the cat spying on it. What if I was the one who saw it? I can't run. OMG."

The line "I can't run. OMG" really cracked me up. Oh em gee, mother, you're so coño. Clearly, the stroke hasn't dampened your hirits.