Mga Istoryang Sinauna: Ipiseseseses!

Derdo shared this in Facebook a couple of days ago.

Please ignore the completely unrelated background.
It was either this or a picture of an ipis. No contest, obviously.
From Femina

So true, right? Why does it fly to you when you're trying to murder it? Burst of bravado? Or perhaps a bluff? Which usually works, by the way! And why are the so hard to kill? They're terrorists, I tell you.

Back in college, we had to dissect those damned insects for our Invertebrate Biology class. We were teamed up in twos, and fortunately, I got teamed with my best friend. Afraid na ako sa simula pa lang, but I thought na kakayanin ko naman. Walang kalaban-laban yung cockroach -- it was pinned to the dissecting pan and there was no chance of it flying.

I was feigning bravery and failing in each passing moment, PERO once I sliced it open, it emitted a smell so foul!!! I retched. My friend, who had been so patient with my kaartehan, took over and did the rest of the dissection. Grabe, I owe her my life. Friends forever, teh!

Anyway, hindi yan ang main kwento.

I was living alone in a one-room apartment in a seedy part of Parañaque near the office. Before sleeping, I noticed a tiny part of the ceiling fell. I didn't pay much attention, thinking I can tell the owner the next day.

So nakatulog na ako. Around midnight, I heard more pieces of wood falling. Kebs lang. Back to sleep. 

THEN NAGISING AKO, WITH A THOUSAND COCKROACHES SCRAMBLING ALL OVER MY FACE AND BODY. ALL OVER THE ROOM. And the all-too familiar foul smell permeating my room. I was living a nightmare. I was screaming. And I thought I'd pass out.

Thankfully, I was able to take a hold of myself and I tried to kill as many as I could and I opened the windows and the door and let the living leave (take no prisoners!) and then I swept the rest out. Di na ako nakatulog after that. I closed the hole in the ceiling. I inspected every nook and cranny and washed every surface with disinfectant. Deodorized the room. Buti maliit lang yung room ko. I felt violated. Took a bath twice. Or was it thrice?

Still traumatized till now. Seriously, can you give me one positive contribution of cockroaches to our ecology? No, I didn't think so. And whoever eradicates cockroaches deserves a Nobel Prize. But until then, I'm keeping my bug spray with me. #LoveYouBaygon! :)